


Gasoline for the Too Young

by MistyBeethoven



Series: Yes, I Really Am This Pathetic! [104]
Category: Bill & Ted (Movies)
Genre: Cautionary Tale, Dark, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Depressing, Disturbing, Disturbing Themes, Evil, F/M, Fat Shaming, Grooming, Loss, Loss of Innocence, Manipulation, Older Man/Younger Woman, Overweight, Pedophilia, REALLY EVIL TED, Rats, Robot/Human Relationships, Robots, Sad, Science Fiction, Self-Insert, Serious, Sexual Bullying, Sexual Coercion, Teenagers, Triggers, Underage Kissing, Underage Sex, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love, Weight Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-17 15:54:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29595177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MistyBeethoven/pseuds/MistyBeethoven
Summary: On the evening that the Wyld Stallyns perform at San Dimas' Battle of the Band, I find myself walking around town, feeling sorry for myself and grieving over Ted "Theodore" Logan's rejection of me for being too young.I am soon both elated and confused, however, when the boy appears out of nowhere, telling me that he and Elizabeth are over and that he officially wants me to be his new "princess".The price of initiation, however, soon pulls me out of the safety of my childhood and into an adult realm I am not ready for...One where I quickly discover the danger of receiving what we might want and how what fuels us can take us to destinations we are not ready for.*You can take or leave this as part of the "Time After Time" series.
Relationships: Billie Logan & Ted "Theodore" Logan, Elizabeth/Ted "Theodore" Logan, Evil Robot Ted & Chuck De Nomolos, Evil Robot Ted & Evil Robot Bill, Evil Robot Ted/Me, Ted "Theodore" Logan & Bill S. Preston Esq., Ted "Theodore" Logan/Me
Series: Yes, I Really Am This Pathetic! [104]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1589944
Comments: 4
Kudos: 1





	Gasoline for the Too Young

**Author's Note:**

> I started this on Thursday and almost did not post it here because of the content. I've been struggling with that choice for days now.
> 
> Here's the creation behind it...I realized that Evil Ted did not have an entry here. He's technically not Ted but another Keanu character completely. So it was needed.
> 
> Now I always watch Bogus Journey and the scene with the evil breath and Missy jars me. I always wondered why they didn't just hit her. They're evil after all, killed Bill and Ted and are also trying to kill cats on the street! Murder means nothing to them. Hitting seems less vile. Then I learned that originally they *did* hit her but the studio didn't like it. 
> 
> I kind of get it. Really I do.
> 
> But still evil breath is just so stupid and in my head I know that they would still have just slugged her.
> 
> I thought of the already existing B&T fics to this series and the sad possibility of what Evil Ted might do with the girl in love with the real Ted came to me. There was no evil breath, no holds barred, just a creature without conscience or morals and a young girl willing to do anything to win the man she loves. 
> 
> It was sad but I saw within that sadness a fragment of truth and the chance to explore what drives human beings and how that can be used in a very destructive way, especially for the young and the vulnerable.
> 
> So, please forgive me for this one.
> 
> I debated on that coda too. So I'll state now that you can take or leave it.
> 
> This is going into the "Time After Time" series but I'm not sure if it is canon for it. Kind of silly to use the word canon for fanfic but I still will.

The night of the Battle of the Bands, I couldn't bring myself to use the ticket I had bought in advance after first hearing that the Wyld Stallyns were trying out. Instead I wandered aimlessly around San Dimas. My feet refused to take my chubby, teenage body anywhere near the theater, aware that Ted "Theodore" Logan would be there performing with Elizabeth, the woman he was in love with and had just proposed to as well.

_"His real princess,"_ I thought in great pain as I walked down the street, wallowing in the conceit that I had been in love with him long before she had even entered his life.

I'd always known that Ted would find a real princess one day and not the fat, awkwardly shy classmate of his little brother Deacon. It was just that, expecting it to hurt like hell, I still had never expected it to hurt _this_ much either. My heart sounded about in as much agony as Bill & Ted's guitars did whenever the two boys attempted to play them.

"Too young...he thinks that I'm too young," I said aloud, thinking of how I had first met him when I had been only a kid and all the time I had spent praying to God that he'd see me as someone older eventually.

I rubbed my chubby upper arm in remembrance of the older boy colliding with it right before he had broken my heart by revealing that the reason he was in such a hurry was so that he could buy a ring for Elizabeth. I could feel a phantom pain on my arm just as I could still feel the destruction of my heart everytime I remembered his words.

And my own strong reaction...

_"Wait, oh please, Ted, wait," I had clung to him then without shame and pleaded into his arm, muttering in desperation and hopelessness, urged to finally be honest from both emotions._

_But all he had said in return was "I can't."_

_"I can't."_

_He wasn't willing to wait that long; not willing to wait until a time when I was no longer too young to do the things most grown men wanted to do with their girlfriends._

_"I've got to get going, little princess," he had said before leaving me; that last added to try to make the wounding words softer._

A reminder that I would always be his little princess.

"Hey, little princess," I heard the exact voice I'd been thinking of say the very same words to me in the present.

I quickly turned around to find Ted standing behind me. The sun was setting behind his back and it shone in my eyes making it hard to see the boy. But it was Ted. I knew it from his voice, from the outline of his body and the clothing he was wearing, which was the same outfit he had been wearing the last painful time that I had seen him. The setting sun burnt like a fire behind him, like the flames you see depicted in paintings of hell or like when someone had poured gasoline all over the sky and then lit a match to it.

"Ted?" I said, squinting my eyes, trying to see him better.

I could clearly see the whites of his teeth then as his already present smile grew wider. "I was hoping I could catch you," he said and walked closer towards me, each footstep full of confidence but oddly devoid of the goofy, good natured grace the boy had possessed ever since I had known him. I wanted to run away as strongly as I wanted to close the distance between us because of the difference in his movement. But instead I chose to only stand petrified where I was.

"Why?" I asked when he was standing about an inch from me. This close now, I saw that it was indeed Ted "Theodore" Logan but his face also seemed as different from his usual self as his walk was. The smile was somehow more harsh around the edges, his eyes more focused and determined. Ted usually reminded me of a friendly big, black Labrador on most days; one I wanted nothing more than to give a belly rub too or ruffle the hair of. Today, though, something else was coming off of him. I had learned that dogs had all come from wolves long ago and that at certain times they could fall back into that untamed behavior easily. The thought crossed my mind that maybe something like that had happened to my friend as I stared at his smile and the teeth displayed in his wide grin.

"I had a most heinous fight with Elizabeth," he said, his smile fading too swiftly as he looked down in a sorrow which didn't feel quite right. Just as quickly, he looked back up at me, his left hand darting up. "She gave me back my ring."

My eyes went to the plastic heart shaped item held between his finger and thumb and my heart felt broken and healed all at once. I'd been picturing it all day on the princess' finger to my constant pain. Knowing that it was no longer there helped. However, knowing it came at Ted's expense made that joy weakened and tinged with guilt.

But Ted didn't really seem all that upset about it...

"What were you fighting about?" I asked, unsure why the two lovers so seemingly in love had decided to break-up.

Ted stared at me for three seconds, the frightening grin returning briefly as his dark eyes glowed with some secret knowledge. "Nothing...well, maybe I'll tell you later. What's important is this now..."

Ted "Theodore" Logan grabbed my hand and I watched in shock as he slipped it on my finger. "I want you to have it, Erin. I want you to be my babe."

I blinked so fast in surprise that my eyelids almost had whiplash. Looking down at the ring, my heart caught on fire as much as the sun falling behind my long time crush's back.

Every other thought flew out of my brain. It's funny how often when you are given what you want, you tend to forget too quickly about all the fears, misgivings and questions you once had. Only when it's too late to save you anymore do they have the courtesy to return.

"You really mean it, Ted?" I asked, swallowing and raising my eyes from his hand on mine and to his face.

"Yeah," he replied. "If I'd had half a brain I'd have taken advantage of you long ago."

A jolt went through my soul, like a surge of electricity in a malfunctioning electronic. "What?" I asked, slightly shocked from my happiness by his words.

"Me and my sucky vocabulary!" Ted said, smacking his forehead. "I just meant, if I was _smarter_ , you'd have been my girl since the first time that we met."

I smiled brightly but a little voice piped up inside of my head. _"You were only a child, Erin!"_ it whispered urgently. I didn't listen to it, though. That child had loved Ted "Theodore" Logan so very much that the teenager she had become focused more on what she wanted than what she rightfully should have.

"Look this street is too busy for me to tell you what I want to," Ted stated, looking around at the street, which didn't really seem all that busy. "We should go somewhere more private to talk."

The hand which gripped my wrist and started dragging me down the uncrowded street was vice like and frighteningly strong. It was like a shackle around me and I couldn't help but follow. I was expecting him to take me to a restaurant maybe or a bookstore, but instead Ted strangely chose an alley between a San Dimas pizzeria and a sports equipment store. It was dark and smelled pungnently of oregano and garlic. He backed up against a wall and situated my body before his.

"Ted," I said. "If you want we can go to my house. My..."

I didn't get the chance to finish; the boy suddenly clasped his hands to each of my cheeks and placed his thumbs forcefully over my lips, silencing me. "I wan't to be _alone_ ," he said. "Just me and you, little princess."

Another little flash of dangerous warmth inside my soul as I nodded and Ted pulled his thumbs back. He studied my face with almost brutal affection. My small hand, now bearing his ring, went to softly clasp his wrist and I returned his gaze with far softer adoration.

"You like me, little princess?" Ted asked after a while, his hands on my cheeks were suprisingly cold, I realized. They were two steel sheets kept in the freezer and the chill of them against my skin crept straight to my soul. Yet, I told myself, cold hands warm heart, the expression my grandfather would often use whenever giving or receiving a cold handshake.

"Ted," I whispered, looking up into his eyes and trembling from his skin like a layer of frost upon my own and from the way my warm feelings tried to fight it and give us both some heat. "You know that I don't just like you. I..."

The man moved his finger to my lips to stop me from saying that I loved him; once again my speech was unimportant to him. Looking into his eyes, filled with dark amusement, I saw that they were as cold as the skin pressed against mine and with little room for emotion. The more he studied my face with his finger poised at my mouth, the more his apathy turned to amusement and I realized a thought had occurred to him.

"Show me," he said. "Show me that you love me."

Fear bubbled up through my soul, thick like bursts of air in black oil reaching the surface. "How?" I asked.

Ted kept our eyes locked, but his hand went to the belt of his jeans. He unbuckled it without looking or fumbling, his eyes on mine, even as I began to shake my head, realizing what he meant.

"Elizabeth wouldn't _show_ me how much she loved me," Ted stated. "That's why we broke up...she was a real bad princess...like whoa! How did I ever end up with her? But you won't be like that will you?" he asked. "You're not a bad princess, are you, Erin? You're my _good_ little princess...right?"

His hand had moved on to unzipping his fly and fishing around for what he was after inside. I whimpered a little unintentionally, knowing what he was getting at and terrified.

"Just a little touch to _show_ me?" he coaxed. "Something my _grown_ up girl would do."

I wanted to be a grown up...wanted to be _his_. I looked away, still frightened and instantly, the hand that had found what it wanted likewise found my plump hand resting to my side. "Look...your finger is so fat the ring looks like it's too small...maybe I should take it off..." Ted stated.

The insult, the threat, brought my hand to the piece of flesh between us. I instantly processed the length of it and how it was hard before I had even touched it, the boy already aroused with anticipation or from his cruelty towards me. _"He's just drunk,"_ I reasoned away. _"He got drunk when Elizabeth left him; that's why he's not acting normal..."_

Only when the boy exhaled sharply, he stiffening in my grip, I smelled no alcohol on his breath, only something that smelt oddly of gasoline.

_"It's just a touch,"_ I then told myself, ignoring his sober breath. _"I'm just touching it...that's okay, right? This is normal...it's...it's what girlfriends and boyfriends do..."_

"Run your plump and most excellent little palm up and down it now, okay, little princess?" he requested.

I nodded and did just that; if I was already touching it...well what was the difference in doing what Ted "Theodore" Logan wanted? Touching it wasn't so bad. I touched my breasts all the time.

The length increased as I made the first few awkward runs up and down, but my hand felt weird against the growing thing. I looked to Ted scared but he looked at my hesitation in annoyance, wanting more of my touch and less of my reluctance.

"Here," he said grabbing my palm. "Spit on it," he instructed. "That will make it move easier."

This too I did, but with embarrassment. However, as the gob of saliva went from my mouth to my palm, linked by a thread of spit, Ted seemed more interested than grossed out. Infact when my hand returned to pump him more easier, _it_ had grown even a little more.

Ted groaned and grabbed my butt in approval of my touch, making me feel strange and on fire between my legs. He pulled me closer to him and the now wet part bumped up against my tummy and the flames increased. The part of me it was meant to fit was responding in excitement but my mind was freaking out, both excited and feeling ashamed. I didn't feel like a _good_ little princess; I felt like a very bad one.

But Ted Logan was only interested in what I was making him feel it seemed.

"Feel that, little princess?" he said in a harsh moan. "That's a full on ro....a full on chubby you got in your hands...you're a big girl now..."

I felt it, hot and hard in my hands. I liked it and hated it, was repelled and attracted, kept feeling something swelling down below on me but was feeling so guilty about it and gross the feeling became soured and something screamed inside of my head.

"Big girls kiss it...did you know that?" he asked, touching the side of my face again. "They run their tongues on the tip and get their saliva all over it; just like you did with your palm...you think you could be my most _righteous_ babe and do that for me?"

He raised my face to his and I saw his greedy need written all over it and inside of his crazed grin. "You and me...us together...can you seal it with a kiss?"

I went to kiss his lips but he pushed my head lower with great force, until I was on my knees, hitting my chin on the way down on what he had been talking about all along. "Not my lips, little princess!" he said with a laugh.

I thought about crawling away. This wasn't Ted...it couldn't be my Ted. Something had to have changed to have made him so different from the boy I had fallen in love with. This Ted never would have needed a hug and support after his intelligence had been insulted by Deacon; this Ted didn't need offered affection or affirmation but forced and bullied it out of someone instead.

"Please," Ted said, his voice suddenly soft, more so than what was touching my face. "Elizabeth hurt me so badly, Erin," he said, his voice low and mournful. "It hurts a dude when a woman doesn't show it...when he can't get release...it turns him into someone else."

Was this why he was acting this way, I thought? Had Elizabeth hurt him so badly by not helping him. "Does she not treat you right?" I asked, looking up into his lowered face.

My breath on him, and possibly seeing himself so close to where he wanted to be, an excited twitch was given as Ted looked down and offered me his wide smile. "Yeah...and it hurts so bad...like I got a thousand pounds I have to lug around...like I was made of steel..." His smile grew wider and then faded. "Help me, Erin," he pleaded, another look of pleasure on his face mingled with sorrow.

I looked down at the swollen thing now, too frightened to before. It was my first full look at it this close. 

"It's about as fat as you are," Ted commented, a remark that stung. He had bever used that word for me before and I was about to turn and run, until he cradled my face again and whispered, "And just as beautiful."

Dying for the compliment, on fire like a match, I shyly brought my lips to flesh and kissed it.

Ted shuddered from the contact. "Good little princess," he praised. "Now lick the tip...lick it all over."

I pretended the thing was an ice cream cone or popsicle not knowing what else to do with it. It worked well enough. Ted fell back against the wall as I tasted him. The skin against my tongue felt soft and smooth but not right...it tasted of metal...and it tasted _fake_.

"Ted," I said, taking my head away.

"No," he mumbled. "No...you're not done yet..."

Afraid now that I had already gone this far that I was bad and dirty, I brought my tongue back to where it had been.

"Oh FUCK!" Ted cried, using a word I'd never heard him use before. "FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!" he cried out several times and then looked down at me to see my shock. "We're adults now, Erin...doing adult things...we can use _adult_ words," he tried to continue.

I continued, whimpering.

"Put it in," Ted suddenly requested. "I wanna see me in you."

"I can't," I said, using the words he had told me yesterday. 

"Yes, you can," Ted said. "Or else I'll have to find a girl who doesn't complain so much...a real _mature_ woman."

A tear was born and quickly escaped from my eye. Feeling very young still, I also feared that the rest of Ted would be taken from me if I refused that one part. Unsure but scared, I placed it between my lips.

"That's good, little princess...oh shit, that's so good," Ted praised. "Now deeper...and clench your lips..."

It was hard to do both when he was filling it to the max. It was awkward and uncomfortable and I struggled. I used the spit I could muster and started to move my head, sliding my mouth up and down. I felt dizzy, unable to breath at the same time.

And all the while, Ted watched, ignoring my struggle in his rapture. He threw his head back but his eyes remained on me; stealing my warmth for himself. I had another strong taste of metal, like biting on tin foil as it started to really twitch, preparing to come.

I tried to get it out of my mouth...it tasted all wrong like I had placed my mouth up to the pipe at the back of a car and it was leaking exhaust into my throat. Ted was alternately smiling, groaning in release and laughing as I frantically continued to slide my lips off from him. When I finally managed to reach the tip, he made a triumphant shout and I could taste something spraying out:

Gasoline.

In fright, I moved my head back and watched in horror as a fluid which was unmistakenly the same type of fuel you used for a car, motorcycle or some other mechanical piece that needed to actually move in some way, flew out from Ted Logan and hit my face. It continued to erupt and spurt all over me until I cried out, "Stop, please, stop!"

Once again, I was not heard.

"Little princess, little princess, little princess," Ted shouted out throughout his seemingly never ending release, mocking me and the fond name which existed between us. Or, at least, I thought he was mocking us. When the last spray of gasoline had covered my face, Ted reached down and pulled me up his long body, so my big tummy brushed against what had been spent. He hugged me before licking off the gasoline from my face. His tongue was soft and yet too insistent and rough to be considered kind.

"Oh you're such a good little princess," the man said. "Why would he want her? You couldn't force or coax or push her into giving you what you really wanted! Why wouldn't he want you?"

His words more than even his inhuman cum pushed me into understanding what I always should have known: I wasn't in the real Ted "Theodore" Logan's arms...He would have never allowed himself to be with me.

Because I was too young.

And I was.

I had tried to run away from the fact and given the boy I loved an adult form of love to keep him happy but I wasn't ready. I felt scared, dirty, strange...like I had been tainted and warped like a record that had gotten too hot.

Ted "Theodore" Logan for all of his insecurity about his intelligence had been smart enough not to play with the fire of what he shouldn't.

I was a child, something Ted had understood and respected.

"What are you?" I asked, trying to struggle free from his arms but knowing from the way that his embrace was tightening that he wouldn't let me. I would have been unable to fight back against Ted anyway, his height and sex overpowering me easily. But this was something else entirely; this was just like the gasoline seed on my tongue: alien.

"My maker keeps telling me I'm like your Ted," the man replied. "The dude hates me and evil Bill for it but why'd he make us that way then? Most unfair..."

"There's a Bill too?" I asked.

"You got it, little princess," he said almost proudly. "I could have brought Bill back here to party too...but I'm a little selfish...I wanted you all for myself."

He ran a cold finger down my cheek and looked into my eyes. "I could tell from the books...from his interviews that he regretted something...something he couldn't let himself do...something that I'd have no problem with."

The evil Ted kissed me then. His lips were as cold as the rest of him and his mouth gave off the same metallic taste the other part of his anatomy had. The kiss was too forceful, suddenly it was like he was using my face to rub the skin off of his own. "STOP IT!" I shouted.

His large, strong hand grabbing the back of my head, Evil Ted, pulled me back to see his true face. His skin like latex had spread back; through the enlarged hole that had once been his mouth, I saw metal and wire, two large eyes like those you see used in dolls, stared back at me and his teeth looked particularly frightening now exposed.

I couldn't help but scream only to have the robot gag me. I was crying and struggling while he easily resisted my attempts to escape. I was lifted as easily as if I weighed what I wanted to and soon found myself thrown to the dirty alley floor. Old pieces of pizza lay around with jagged stones and Evil Ted replaced his hand over ny mouth with a crumpled up soda cup, shoving it where once he had been. My first fear was that he was going to take something else from me too. It didn't go away either as he found some rope lying nearby and began to tie me up.

I wriggled about trying to get free and screamed loudly, a sound muffled by the cup.

Finished, the robot put back his Ted face and smiled down at me. "Don't worry, little princess; I'll be back for you. We got lots to try out...that was just the beginning. I just have to destroy the thread of events which would bring about world peace. Me and Evil Bill first gotta go and kidnap the princesses and then spoil the Wyld Stallyns gig at the Battle of the Bands. We do this by killing the royal bitches in front of a live studio audience! Radical! No more Wyld Stallyns! You see, I already killed the real Bill and Ted..."

I stopped struggling at the words, my heart breaking and the fight taken out of me.

Realizing my reaction, Evil Ted's smile grew. "Oh yeah! I killed him this morning. Didn't I tell you that? I'm all that you have now..."

Tears fell from my eyes and I lay helplessly on the concrete in shock.

"So with Bill and Ted outta the way all that's left is to ruin their legacy. After that..." he shrugged. "Other than playing with you...oh and I think I'll off Evil Bill while I'm at it. He's kind of getting on my nerves and I think it's time I went solo!"

Evil Ted began a air guitar solo and then started to laugh viciously. "I'm tired of being thought of as the dumb one...I'm smart enough to play dumb until I can take over this whole show, including De Nomolos' act too...that will be awesome...killing my god. Your Ted only gets to meet His."

The evil robot saw my tears and my violent weeping and I could see that he was getting turned on by me again: I had become his fuel. Or rather my sorrow had.

He bent down and caressed my cheek. "Don't worry, little princess, I'll be back..." he stated, his fake skin against my real one. "It's a pity you're organic...With what I want to do to you I might wear you out or you might bust! Bogus!" he looked truly upset until a thought occurred to him. "If that happens, I guess, I'll just go and find another girl like you: there are so many girls like you, Erin," he said with a happily evil grin. "That's the thing with humans: they break so easily but they can be easily replaced. De Nomolos keeps saying Bill and I are worth billions of dollars...but you organics can be made just from fucking. Crazy!"

He bent down to steal another kiss and his lips were colder than ever now that I knew what he was and what he had done, not just to me. Evil Ted stood and walked off, cock sure and ready to destroy. Lying there though, knowing Ted, the real Ted was gone, I couldn't find the strength to stop him or care anymore. I felt like I no longer possessed any energy.

Occassionally, in my desolation, a rat passed me, stopping to blink in curiosity before scavenging for scraps.

I was crying, frantically, the paper cup in my mouth becoming soggy. I kept heaving if I concentrated on it too much or the memory of what the Evil Ted had coerced me into doing to him before I was truly ready for it.

It was the thought of that which finally pushed me out of my self pity and into determination. I couldn't have the rest of San Dimas thinking that the perverted, destructive piece of metal and wire was really Ted Logan. The boy I had fallen in love with might have been dead and gone but his memory, at least, survived and I could save it. I might feel destroyed now, I understood, but I couldn't live with people hating my Ted.

Moving about, I grabbed a piece of hard rock but it didn't work in cutting the rope. I must have been trying for about and hour before I gave up, my hands becoming numb and my fingers sore. Maybe if I had two days...but I didn't and something sharper was needed now. More time passed before a new idea presented itself. The scampering of the rats catching my attention, I thought about what they had come for and their own gasoline.

I braved myself and grasped behind my back for a piece of pepperoni pizza, waiting for a creature more bold than its companions to become interested. To make the food more enticing, I cut myself on another rock; while it had not been strong enough on the rope, it cut through the skin of a finger with ease. This act brought one rat closer, its whisker's wiggling as it caught the scent of my blood.

"Here," I said, moving and wiggling the bloody piece of pepperoni at the rodent with his sharp teeth.

Driven by hunger or a realization that I was helpless, the rat came closer and started to eat the meat...

Which I held very close to the rope...

That eventually broke.

I sat up immediately, frightening off my furry helper, and began to untie the rope at my feet. "I gotta help him," I said to the scurrying rat. "I wish to God the real Ted was alive but this is the best I can do."

I rose to my feet and stumbled, right into the wall where I had provided Evil Ted with his own gasoline. Crying out, I chose to fall onto the pavement instead and then just tried to keep moving, the feeling coming back slowly to my feet and legs, if not my heart

* * *

Running to the theater where the Battle of the Bands was taking place, I passed a group of people all standing outside of a store called Jim's Electronics.

A familiar voice was talking on the TVs and I pushed through the crowd in order to see it, weary as I was.

"Did you see them detroy those evil robots?" I heard a man saying.

"Yeah! Their heads flew right off!" a woman replied.

"Now they're back!" someone else was saying. "After a sixteen month honeymoon..."

I fell back into the wall of people as I saw the screen and the sight of Ted "Theodore" Logan. My Ted. Apparently, his conversation with God had gone very well: he was alive and well with a heavy metal beard and moustache, adorned with a rock star getup...

Complete with a baby on his beautiful back.

"This is little Bill," he introduced the world to his child.

I cried again, in relief and in pain and in joy and in sorrow because, for a second time that night I had gotten what I had wanted and it hurt so damn much.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we've been to the past, we've been to the future," Bill S. Preston Esq announced.

"We've been all around the afterlife," Ted continued.

"And you know?" Bill posed.

"The best place to be is here," Ted mused.

"And the best time to be is now," Bill followed. "And alls we can say is..."

"Let's Rock!" they both declared triumphantly and in unison.

Bill and Ted began to play their music and my eyes stayed fixed on the screen as it seemed to unite everyone for one moment in time. The crowd surrounding me joined in, uplifted in celebration also.

I alone was crying.

How long it would last was anyone's guess, I understood, no matter what Evil Ted had claimed.

Everyone had the things which fueled them and often they were at war with each other. So peace was as close to being a fantasy as my belief that I would ever be with a certain boy I had once comforted and still loved had been.

Evil Ted had found his gasoline in the act of hurting others, just as I had found mine in the form of Ted "Theodore" Logan.

And now, I could see Ted's own fuel flashing across the thirty television sets in the window of Jim's Electric, clear for all the world to see and know: the guitar he now could expertly play, the best friend by his side, the princess he adored and whom now was his wife and the baby he loved strapped to his back.

Those would always be Ted's own gasoline: music, friendship, love, the future and mankind.

I had become too tainted to even be included in the second and last ones, I feared now. Corrupted by my need for him and the gift of it presented in sinful synthetic skin covered chrome.

Still I struggled to see Ted as the expert guitar player and husband and father he had become for a reason I soon realized with perfect ironic clarity.

"He looks too young," I murmured an assement of the man I loved but would never have, the same assessment he had given me. But my words lived and died briefly, unheard, within the sound of guitars, applause and the cheers surrounding me.

I quickly turned away from them, no longer continuing my walk to the theater where the Battle of the Bands was taking place but walking slowly back to my house, the taste of gasoline scorching my throat.

_~Coda~_

The theatre was empty the next day...the world still in its euphoria of some false peace. I had come here after the celebration when the Wyld Stallyns were long gone. Off to live their lives and walk towards whatever destiny was in store for them, discovering if it would be what they had been told or if it would be what they even truly wanted.

_"I could tell from the books...from his interviews that he regretted something..."_

I knew only slightly better what my fate had waiting for me.

_"I'm all that you have now..."_

I was looking for the one thing that belonged to me, left over from some dream that had died.

Sometimes we don't get what we want but we take what we can get.

_"Something he couldn't let himself do...something that I'd have no problem with."_

Finding the head of the Evil Ted robot, now has lost and forgotten as I was, I picked him up as if he were as precious as his maker had once claimed.

He had no arms to hurt me with now, no body, no large, frightening thing shooting out gasoline. All he had was his brain and mouth but these he could only use on me if I allowed or wanted it.

I held him to my chest first and rocked him like a doll or a Teddy bear and then I held him out at arms length. I stayed like that, lying on my knees in the middle of the theater, looking like I was playing Hamlet with the strangest Yorick prop ever.

When the robot's eyes opened and he stared into mine, I didn't even break the stare with a blink that I feared would separate us.

"Hello Little Princess," Evil Ted said with a self satisfied smile.

I smiled back, telling myself that I was too young to know _not_ to play with fire.

**Author's Note:**

> Dear Keanu;
> 
> I hope you didn't mind that one horribly. 
> 
> Remembering hearing that Evil Ted was one of your primary reasons for wanting to do the sequel, I had to include him. You were fantastic at capturing an evil version of the good natured boy you had already created. But maybe this turned out too evil, serious and uncomfortable for you? If I can think of a sillier premise, I certainly will return to him again. But there might be a sequel to this one too, I gotta warn you. I have the title picked out already and the storyline.
> 
> I guess, Evil Ted popping up might have also subconsciously been connected to my watching WandaVision recently. I kept seeing ads for it on YouTube and let my curiosity get the better of me. It has a synthetic human if you don't know...but maybe you do know about Vision already, having read Marvel comics. It is a really good show so far and the premise about love and loss wrapped in all the sitcom trappings touches me and makes my heart break. I can't spoil it too much, incase you aren't familiar with it, but Wanda's love for Vision and what she is doing...
> 
> It is really powerful and moving when you understand it.
> 
> In a way though...is that what I'm doing here a little? Creating these worlds where I can have you because outside of them I can't?
> 
>   
> Much love,  
> Erin  
> XO XO  
> :D <3


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